the christian left

Or maybe not.  So, about a week ago, I started a strength training program. Don’t get all in a tizzy, now, it’s something I ran across in one of my lady magazines. You know, the kind where there are recipes and fashion tips as well as gardening and decorating advice. Pretty much what you get from me, except I filter it with my coolness before I send it on. But I digress.  So there was a spread in said periodical about strength and weight training with a detailed 15 minute workout for three days. You’re supposed to do each workout twice per week with one day off. So how hard could it be, right? After all, the average age of reader for this particular publication MUST be in her 50s. I know that because my mom got me the subscription. And she’s in her 50s. Anyway, I search for one of those stupid stability balls that takes up WAAY too much room in our house (thus negating the decorating) and some neoprene covered dumbells. I went with purple because they were 8 lbs. That was a recommended starting point.

So, away I went. The first workout was upper body. Really, I figured I’d be fine after lifting kids and cleaning and doing all the stuff I do in a given day. I was not at all prepared for the trembling, shaky result that would be my humbled shoulders, arms, and back. And this was only with two 8 lb weights! But I made it through. Then, on to the core. I knew this would be a challenge since I had never really worked out my midsection before. And, well, to be honest, that’s the main reason I started the program. I need something to help put everything where it belongs. Hopefully it will help me get rid of what I have that I don’t need, but we’ll see. Well, my ribs hurt like something just kicked me really hard. And then there was the lower body. How hard could it be, right? I run about 4 times per week (low mileage, slow, but I do it) and I have gotten a lot stronger since the end of May. So, yeah, I did that workout and I am afraid to run. My legs are all shaky.

How is it that other women can do this and I am all problematic here? How hard IS it to get in shape? How long DOES it take? And what if it simply isn’t for me? So, I am really humbled here. I thought “it wasn’t that bad” and now I know that letting myself go for years and years hasn’t helped me a single iota. Apparently you can’t just pick up and run miles and miles without getting hurt at my age. Apparently you can’t just make these things happen painlessly. I go slow and persist because I want to be able to be active even in my old age, which I am evidently already living. But how long DOES it take? Or am I just an anomaly? I started the couch to 5k plan on May 31, and I am still not running 5k. I do run the 30 prescribed minutes, just barely, before feeling like I am drowning and passing out. And now I am trying the old lady weights. Someone get me a swimsuit with a skirt, a swimcap, and some water aerobics. STAT.

So if the 50somethings are doing this workout and anxious enough to read another workout similar to it next issue, then WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME??? I guess I plug along. And at some point, a day that is very much not today, I should reassess my addiction to cooking tasty foods like cookies. I am sure that doesn’t help.

Oh, and if you have any better workout ideas, throw ‘em my way. I’ll probably try it.